Be it your friend or a stranger one thing that connects us all and makes someone feel comfortable in our presence is the ability to listen patiently. In a world where we are constantly running as if we are in a race finding no time for our near and dear ones. Doing this is surely affecting our relationships with them. So in order to re-establish the connection, the warmth in our bonds which we now find missing we need to develop our listening skills. Listening skills as simple as it seems is actually a very subtle art that needs to be mastered over time. It’s a skill that demands patience to be mastered. Below I am giving some tested ways on How to Be a Good Listener which you can use to improve your listening skills over time.
8 Effective Ways on How to Be a Good Listener:
1. Keep aside your smartphones
It is very important that you keep your gadgets away and give your whole undivided attention to the person sitting in front of you. Just imagine you meet someone and instead of talking to you, he is using his smartphone to chat with his friend present online. This indeed seems insulting as if you are not worthy of their time. The same is their feelings when you do the same. So be a sensible person and keep your smartphone away while talking to the person in front.
2. Keep your mouth shut
It is very hard to curb your desires to reply back to the person but you must do it if you wanna make the other person feel understood by you as that can only happen when you will give them enough time to unwind their thoughts in front of you without causing any sort of interruption. To do that you must keep your mouth shut until the person completes his sentence.
3. Maintain Eye contact
Well, you don’t have to stare but yes you need to maintain healthy eye contact with the person if you wanna come off as a trustworthy person in front of them. Eyes tell the strength of your soul to let the person have confidence on you, you need to maintain a healthy eye contact with him which will ensure him that you are getting what he is telling to you.
4. Respond wisely
Active listening also involves responding in a way that encourages the person to tell more. For that, you need to ask him open-ended questions which gives him a chance to state his views in front of you in a much broader way as compared to when you would have asked a close-ended question whose answer is either a yes or a no. Also, don’t make the conversation feel like as if you are having an interview. Our aim is to make the person feel comfortable in our presence.
5. Be Empathetic
Being empathetic is the core of being a good listener. You need to make the person feel having a conversation with you like a blanket or a hug. Your aim is to comfort the person in front of your understanding. Make the person in front feel felt and understood well and he will begin to trust you like anything.
6. Be Non-judgmental
Being non-judgemental is a skill that requires a certain level of maturity. You need to keep your believes and opinions to yourself. You have to stop yourself from giving any unsolicited advice. You have to understand that you are no one to tell anyone what they should do as it’s their life. Keep your opinions to yourself give them only when someone asks from you for the same otherwise not.
7. Use touch
There is magic in the human embrace. A right touch at the right time at the right place can make the person feel cared for by you and in return, you will earn respect for doing the same. But you need to be aware while doing this as a small mistake, that is placing your hand at the wrong place at the wrong time can make the person feel uncomfortable in your presence and will make you feel like a pervert. So break the touch barrier but start by tapping on the shoulder or hand to let then feel that you understand them. The point is to make them feel comfortable and not vice versa.
8. Speak softly
Understand that your voice tone has the ability to agitate as well as the ability to make the person cool calm and collected. So speak softly to make the person in front feel cared by you and to put you in the positive light in their eyes. You have to learn to do this over time if you have the habit of speaking loudly in general. Know that some people are more sensitive than others so we can’t treat them with the same voice tone as it is quite possible that someone might take it as an offense and may end up having hard feelings for you.
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